Have you seen Sex and the City, the movie? If not, I’m very sorry to spoil this for you, but do you know the part when Samantha breaks up with Smith and says that she needs to work on her relationship with herself? Establishing self- love: To be kind to yourself is one of the most powerful things you can do for positivity.
How often do we ever say that to ourselves? I’m by no means advocating ending relationships based on finding more time for loving ourselves. I’m just asking: how often do we love and cherish ourselves as we are? How kind are we to ourselves?
The answer is most likely – not nearly enough.
Let’s take a look at some of the things you can do to show yourself self- love and be kind to yourself, the person you indeed are, better.
Stop Comparing Yourself to Others
The only person you need to compare yourself to if you want to play the comparing game is the person you used to be. Yesterday, a year ago, a decade ago – as long as you’re becoming more and more the kind of person you want to be, you are doing a great job.
Comparing yourself to others is merely pointless. First, you don’t know their story, not really. You only know what they choose to share with you, and that’s most often just the best bits. And second of all, they are not you. They are entirely different, and you can never be them, which means that you get to be you – the best possible person in the world.
Stop Worrying About What Others Think
While we are on the subject of comparisons and judgment – you should also aim to stop caring about what other people think about you. You can never actually influence that. People will have their beliefs and values, and they will believe what they want to find. Rare are those whose opinions and deeply rooted ideas can be changed through a conversation or a series of actions.
The only person who needs to approve of you and your actions is, you’ve guessed it – you. You are living your life for yourself, and you can do whatever you want with it (as long as you’re not harming someone else!). No one else will live your life, and you are not living your life so someone can approve of it. You do you, babe, and stick to your dreams.
Reconsider the Way You Treat Your Body
And I am not for one second talking about your weight if that’s what you were thinking.
I’m talking about the other things you’re doing to your body: are you making sure it gets plenty of rest, and that it receives the recovery time it needs from lugging you around all day? Are you giving it enough water, the nutrients it needs, and making sure your skin and hair are getting the nourishment they need? This is what self- love is about and to be kind to yourself.
Think about the way you sleep, as not sleeping enough is the gateway to a bad mood and poor mental and physical health. Think about the products you’re putting into your body and whether they’re giving it what it needs to grow and prosper. If you identify any room for change and improvement, seize it. After all, your body is yours for life, and the better you treat it, the more it will allow you to do.
Don’t Worry About the Future and Dwell on the Past
The funny thing about life is that we only ever get to experience it in the present, and yet we spend so much time living in the past (which can’t be changed) or trying to imagine the future (which we can never predict and never truly control).
Learning how to live in the present is an incredible gift and a habit you can learn to nurture, and one that will help you live a more fulfilled and enjoyable life. If you manage to stop obsessing about things that have happened and those that have yet to happen, you will realize there’s a whole lot of life right here and now.
Be Mindful of Your Language
Finally, think about the way you talk to yourself. Is there a whole lot of negativity or self- love there? Do you call yourself all kinds of names? Do you nitpick at every tiny little thing that is not perfect about you?
The thing is, we would never speak as negatively to anyone else – we only do it to ourselves.
And we are no different from all those other people when you come to think about it. We are all prone to mistakes, none of us are perfect, and we all deserve to be treated with kindness and a whole lot of love.
So next time you start talking to yourself negatively, check yourself, and change your language. You’ll notice it makes quite a difference.
To Sum It Up
Being kind and showing self-love to yourself is a habit you might have to work on – but it’s never too late or early to start. So try some of these tips out, and see how your life changes for the better.